Transitioning to Two

Some of you have asked me if I would write about the transition in our family from having one child to having two children. I’ll be honest – I didn’t really want to write this. Mainly because I have friends who are pregnant with their second and I don’t want to scare the dooby out of them…and also because I have friends with like 8 kids and I know they’re going to laugh at me. But anyway, here goes. And remember, you asked for this.

Honesty: having one kid is super easy. I know those of you with one kid would disagree with me. I know, because I used to just have one and I thought it was rough. Now I’ve got two and I realize just how easy ONE was. Dude…there was ONE. Me versus Annie. I am bigger than her. I win (okay, so I win part of the time).

Now I’ve got TWO. Do you know what happens when you have two? I’ll tell you – they gang up on you. You are now outnumbered. They are partners in crime. They scheme about things to do when you’re on the potty…they have a friend. And when you have a friend, you scheme. I know because I have friends and we scheme. It’s what friends do.

But for real, I thought I had it all together…then my precious Andy arrived and my world turned upside down. Some days I can’t figure out how to go to the bathroom. And some days work so well that I can get everything cleaned, including my children, and dinner on the table…and still smile. And some days Barry comes home and I’m still in my PJs and I forgot to brush my teeth. Welcome home, honey!

I honestly struggled with the transition to two children. It’s hard. It was hard for me. I cried a lot. I still cry a lot. And guess what? Yes, I do want more kids. If I can’t handle two, how on earth can I handle more? I’ll tell you – the grace of God, that’s how. When I think I can’t make it through the day, I remember that His grace is sufficient for me. And sandwiches are sufficient for dinner.

Why having two is hard:

-I’m working with Andy and Annie decides to wash her hands in the toilet.

-I’m working with Annie and Andy decides to poop all over everything…EVERYTHING.

-I’m playing with both kids and Dottie (the dog) decides to poop in the basement. (Do you sense a poop theme?)

-I get both kids dressed, the house cleaned, and lunch made and I realize I haven’t taken a bath…in a few days

-I’m sleep deprived. Wait, what’s that smell?

Why having two is a BLESSING:

-I get two times the amount of smiles, hugs, and kisses

-I have two children to love

-I make memories on a daily basis

-I get to watch them grow up

-They say “I love you, Mommy.”

The blessings FAR outweigh the struggles, my friends. Far outweigh them. I hope I can have many children to multiply those blessings.

There are a few tricks I’ve got up my sleeve now…but I still don’t have it figured out. Just when I think I start to figure it out, we hit a new phase and I’m stupid again. Being a mom teaches me daily that I’m just a big dumbo. But I’m having fun being dumbo (no relation to the flying elephant).

-I wear Andy in the Ergo on my back to prepare dinner. Babywearing is where it’s AT when you have multiple children

-I can put Andy in the Bumbo in the bathroom while I take a shower and Annie watches a movie (yes, I do use the electronic babysitter…I’m cool with it)

-I make the most of Andy’s 30 minute naps (yes, 30 minutes…that’s the hardest part of this whole transition) by doing things I can’t do while holding him

-I make sure Annie has plenty of things to occupy her (coloring books, dress up clothes, etc.)

-I let Annie “help” me whenever possible

-I let them “play” together (see photo above) until someone starts screaming

-I get help from my blessed Mama who keeps Annie one day a week so I can go to the grocery store

-I put Annie in the bathtub…it works people, it works

So, those are my tips. Nothing earth shattering, huh? Two is hard…but the hard things are the most rewarding.

“³Children are a heritage from the Lord,
offspring a reward from him.
⁴Like arrows in the hands of a warrior
are children born in one’s youth.
⁵Blessed is the man
whose quiver is full of them.”

Psalm 127:3-5

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http://www.Berkshirecottage.blogspot.com Sue

I love your posts but I have to admit this one tickled me. Not in a bad way, just in a funny way. I have seven kids and I think that as each one comes along you think, “Ack, how can I do this?” But by the grace of God, you do it. I always laugh when people used to tell me that going from 2-3 or 3-4, or the more you have the easier it is thing… Um…no. It’s not easier, it’s not cheaper; you just learn to prioritize differently. My kids range in age from 28-7, and I’ve been at this mommy business for nearly 30 years…it’s a wonderful, wild ride! Hang on and enjoy every minute, and don’t sweat the small stuff!
- Stacy
  
  I’m hanging! And enjoying myself…but I admit, sometimes I have to remind myself not to sweat the small stuff. Some things just aren’t worth the fight.
- Marilyn
  
  I totally agree with you! And I am glad I did not miss this wild, crazy ride! Easy? No! Worth it? Absolutely!!!!!
  - Stacy
    
    SO WORTH IT!!!!
Marilyn

I am the mother of nine beautiful children. Yes, it has been a challenge in anyway you can think of! However, now that they are older (the youngest is 3), I am SO GRATEFUL ~ MORE GRATEFUL than I ever thought possible for my children. I would LOVE another one ~ if that is God’s will. It is SCARY having them. But I am so GRATEFUL! I know I said that before. But we cannot have children forever or whenever we want them. They are truly a gift from God.
- Stacy
  
  Yes they are – bring on the gifts, Lord! Thanks for your comment, Marilyn…I will remember to be grateful for every moment I have with them. Even the poop.
Tara Davenport

I have to say I’m so glad a mother was finally honest about this topic. I have friends who are pregnant with their second or just had number 2 and I just wanna shake them and ask them if all the ranting I do to them on a daily basis has not made them realize how hard this is!!! One was so easy…and number 1 had colic…does that tell you anything? LOL…actually the first 3 months with her were pure H-E-double you-know-what! I literally NEVER slept and I look back and have no idea how I even functioned so as far as sandwiches go we were lucky to have those! But I was so in love with her that it didn’t matter and I would have given up anything for her (I had a miscarriage 2 months before I got pregnant with her which made me want a child even more and appreciate her even more). Sadly that was not my experience with the second even though both of my children were planned. I love both of my girls very much but most days I wish I had stopped at one. And yet most days I want another baby…go figure…as a mother I will always want another baby but babies turn into 2 year olds and I don’t want anymore of those LOL! My girls are 4 and 2 so sometimes I wonder if it is harder because theyre still so young but then I realize no matter what ages they are…it is double EVERYTHING! Except for it feels like 10 times more work not just double cuz having one is like having one and having 2 is like having 10…true story! The part I hate most is getting the 3 of us ready to go somewhere…ugh! Noone warned me…noone told me the truth…except for my mother…she tried to warn me but of course I didn’t listen cuz she is only a mother of 5 and knows nothing right? But everyone wants to talk about motherhood like its all sunshine and roses and honestly when I had one that was my experience…but having 2 is about 10% sunshine and roses and 90% I’m so frustrated cuz I can’t sit down for 5 minutes, I’ve had to get up 20 times during this meal, I can’t shower, I can’t even use the bathroom in peace! But at the end of the day, they both put a smile on my face and my heart swells with love and pride just from looking at their sweet little faces…cuz theyre sleeping of course hahaha! So thanks for the honesty. It is nice to know I’m not alone.
- Stacy
  
  I might have had the hardest day ever…and nothing went right at all; but then I get sweet baby snuggles and Annie says “I love you, Mama.” After that, all the bad from the day just melts into oblivion.
Abby

Loved this post and especially Sue’s comment. Mine are 25-8 and reading all these comments took me back…plus my dream last night. My oldest was younger again, almost too big to pick up–I had to ask her to jump up to help out. I was crying when I woke up (happy and bittersweet) because I got to hold that baby (who is now 25) once again. Cried for twenty minutes. Cried off an on all day. Crying now while I tell you all about my dream. Young mommies, ENJOY YOURSELVES.
- Stacy
  
  Oh mercy….you almost made ME cry. Shew. I’m not ready for them to grow up.
Melissa

I have 4 kids (7,5,3,2), and the hardest transition was from 1 to 2. I remember crying the day my husband went back to work when #2 was 1 week old. He was so much more “clingy” than my daughter. Would only sleep when being held and occasionally in the swing. Totally second the baby wearing being the bomb! By the grace of God though it got better. He is still 100% a mama’s boy, but I wouldn’t have it any other way. All we can do as moms is do our best to survive the day, and smile at the end of it thinking about all the love that our kids give us.
- Stacy
  
  Andy is attached to his mama for sure. He’s not a fussy baby, but he likes being with me. Annie was VERY needy from the moment she arrived. So, yeah…I know where you’re coming from.
http://christianmommyblogger.com Nikki @ Christian Mommy Blogger

Oh I can relate. As I get ready to transition to three I wonder…HOW ON EARTH WILL I MANAGE! And you do, you just do. It isn’t an “easy” time, these little years, but who said we mama’s deserve easy?? Love you girl. And your beautiful babies!!
- Stacy
  
  Nikki, you ARE SuperMom. I want to be like you when I grow up. You’re like the best mom ever.
Sara

I can relate to the “busy” part. we had three children in less than 3 years n I was depressed much of the time. They’re 4 1/2, 3 and almost 2 now. I just love tho when they cuddle up to me n mumble their ‘I love you’s’. I’m coming to a stage where I’m learning to enjoy the ride and the children
- Stacy
  
  I’m so glad you’ve made it there! Good job, mama!
jfred

Oh my! I barely remember the first yr of #2′s life! It was so hard then. But as he got to be 10ish months old, he started playing w #1, and by 18 months, he started jabbering some with her (ahh, peace!), and now, at 6&8, it’s amazing, those two! I am sooo glad for how well they play and spend their time together!
- Stacy
  
  I just LOVE the jabbering stage!!!!
- http://www.thedoityourselfmom.com Anna@The DIY Mom
  
  I agree the transition to two was harder than to three kids, but once the second was old enough to play with the first things got a bit easier. The third already wants to play with the others, so we’ll see how soon he joins in the fun.
  - Stacy
    
    Yes! Andy is just now starting to get interested in his sister and already it’s a HUGE help!!
http://www.thesimplehomemaker.com Christy, The Simple Homemaker

Someone once told me that one child is hard, but then you have your second and wonder what you did with all your free time when you “only” had one. So true! But seven…seven is a piece of cake! So go for seven. Then we can discuss my little issue with lying about how easy 7 kids are.
- Stacy
  
  I’ll aim for 7…my aim was at least 6!